So, you’re getting to know who you are, and you’re striving to be the best version of yourself, to love yourself. Now you’re feeling ready to start thinking about dating!

I’ll let you in on a little secret: guys find self-respect attractive! A woman who knows her value and sticks to her convictions is way more attractive to a guy than the most beautiful girl in school who has no self-respect and lets guys walk all over her. 

Good guys will wait to have sex if you will. The players and those just looking for a good time won’t stick around once they realize you’re serious, but the best guys will! Those are the ones worth investing your time, energy, and heart into. 

So, how do you date in the real world?

Here are a few tips:

Get to know each other as friends first. Go and do things with a group of friends. Talk to each other in person.

Don’t take any relationship to the next step over text. To have a real relationship, you need to have clear communication in person. The best way to escape the gray area of “talking” or “hanging out” is to talk about things in person. This means clearly communicating about when you’re just friends, when you’re getting to know each other better, and when you’re dating. Clear is kind, both to him and to yourself, even if it’s hard and feelings could get hurt.

Take things slow. When you have such strong feelings for someone, it’s easy to think that you’ll be together forever. But take a step back and look at your situation with fresh eyes. You’re still high schoolers, and neither of you are looking to get married yet. Keep it a little more casual. It’s good to take things slow, both physically and emotionally.