Dear Livvy…

Dear Randomly Beautiful,

This is a red flag and you should not respond. Just delete his message and block him. This could be an online predator trying to meet up with you to kidnap, assault, or sell you into trafficking. Predators convince young girls and even guys that their beauty will land them a modeling job, only to find themselves victims of prostitution, pornography, and slave labor. If he continues to contact you, tell your parents or a teacher. If he sends you a sexually explicit image, report him to the authorities. 

Dear Really Want a Boyfriend,

I understand where you’re coming from. It’s natural to want to be chosen—you are not alone. But it’s also not the case that everyone has a boyfriend! As you wait, I have a couple of ideas. Concentrate on developing into the kind of woman you want to be. Spend time on the things you enjoy. Build solid friendships. Friendships are important to have at every stage of life! When dating, it can be easy to become so infatuated that your identity feels wrapped up with him, causing breakups to leave you feeling like you’ve lost yourself. Good friends will help to keep you grounded. 

Dear Pressured to Sext,

Let’s be clear, you’re not a prude if you say no. And you’re not alone. You may think all your peers are sexting, but did you know that only 15% of adolescents have ever sent a nude?[1] This number has been steadily going down! Standing up to someone else’s demands on the other side of the screen shows you value and respect yourself. You are not just a body. You are a whole and complete person with unique talents and gifts. You have a sense of humor and a personality. A sexually explicit image of yourself treats your body like a disposable object and often, women who send nudes regret it.

Dear Not Ready, There’s no reason to be ashamed for not being ready to send nudes, have sex, or do anything you aren’t ready for! This shows good self-awareness on your end. Before you get in a situation, I recommend setting boundaries about sex. Be upfront with him and talk about it. I recommend saving sex for marriage, and you’re not alone if you want to. Waiting to have sex will make it better, not worse, because your relationship will be on solid ground when you do. Having sex early on will decrease your chance of a successful relationship. If he isn’t willing to agree on the same goals and boundaries as you, let him go. It’ll hurt, but if he really loves you, he won’t just wait for you but join you. He isn’t worth it if he compromises your goals and boundaries.